The return of the non-dangerous perv

I haven’t had the chance to write on my blog over the last little while. Why? I’m not exactly sure. I may be short on inspiration these days. I think that it can also be explained by the fact that I spend so much time in my daily life restraining my true self that I’m not used to really expressing my thoughts anymore.

Those who really know me know that I have a special sense of humour. I come from the George Carlin school of thought. I believe that you can joke about pretty much anything if you construct the joke well. One thing is clear: I do not believe in censorship. When it comes to dirty thoughts, I’m a champ. I love women, I love sex and I love to joke about everything surrounding those subjects. It doesn’t make me a dangerous man. I would never assault or force myself upon anyone: I just love talking about this so beautiful subject. I’m a non-dangerous perv.

Unfortunately, in my daily life, I run into a lot of prudes. People with no sense of humour at all. People that cannot laugh at themselves and at everything around us. Some people take things a little too seriously. When a joke is too spicy, raunchy or whatever, they groan as if they were the fruit on the second immaculate conception in history. Look, folks and folksettes, we’re all here because two human beings somewhere decided to get laid. It got done in different situations and in various ways, but it is one of life’s guarantees. It was probably a case where your dad asked to get some, and he got lucky when your mom finally gave him a slice of pie. Sure, not a pretty thought, but the reality.

Also, we are all born with the same parts. They come in different shapes and proportions, but they are all the same pieces of equipment. They are made to connect, so get over yourselves. Why should a thing so beautiful as sex be taboo? From birth, we are taught that the human body is dirty and that it should be hidden. We are taught what we shouldn’t talk about. Barriers by the ton from the beginning.

I try to be respectful of other people’s sensibilities, but I just don’t understand, In the meantime, I try to restrain myself when I’m not sure about the audience. Some of you have seen me let loose on Facebook sometimes, but I’m still careful there. When I’m surrounded by people who can take it, I finally can be myself, I thank those of you who don’t take everything I say so seriously as to get offended. Your presence in my life is truly a blessing.