I will take a page out of the great George Carlin’s book today and offer you some free-floating hostilities. No rhyme or reason, no line of thought to guide it, just a list of things that bother me or piss me off. Just like my idol George Carlin, I don’t have pet peeves: I have major psychotic hatreds.
Hopefully, you folks with relate with at least some of these.
The inseparable love-birds: I’m talking about those who just can’t keep their hands off each other in public. Those lip-smacking sounds and continuous sweet-nothings being whispered can be a total annoyance. If you’re not willing to put on a full show by doing the nasty in front of everyone, keep it for the privacy of your own home. Half-ass shows, I don’t care for. Go ahead and make it really entertaining, or leave me out of it!
Matching t-shirts: Ah yes, those cute ageing couple (no young couple would dare do such a thing) walking around with matching t-shirts. I saw this American couple in Quebec city last weekend. He had a black and white t-shirt saying: "I’m never right". She had a similar one that read: "He sho’ ain’t". These pathetic morons are cheesy beyond belief and should be told so. Idiots! At least, be witty about the whole thing, or it is pointless!
Bare-chested old men: You have all seen them. Those 65 year old men biking around town with only shorts on. Orange-coloured tans, white chest hairs, flabby skin. Put a shirt on, damnit! Young women, on the other hand, take yours off. You have something good to show, do so!
Pet worshippers: Those people who think their pets are more important than other human being and who want to impose their love of animals unto others. Look, I walk erect (well, most of the time ;P) and I contribute to society. I like to think I take precedence on any pet. And cute pet stories ain’t so cute. Leave me out of it.
More to come. I will try to make this a regular part of my blogging, as it is a good way to get things off your chest. Mine is not bared, thank god, but it is lighter now thanks.
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5 commentaires:
J'adooooooore!!!!!
Spécialement le ti-couple avec le même outfit, main dans la main.
Un jour sans faire exprès, Dan et moi avions un gilet de marque différente mais de la même couleur! Avec jeans tous les deux. Tu t'imagines même pas combien on s'est fait écoeuré par ma famille! Ça fait un bout de ça et on s'en rappelle encore. Disons que maintenant, on se passe en revue avant de sortir!
:D
Ouais, j'imagine que ça peut être accident. Dans le cas de ce weekend, toutefois, ils se répondaient par l'entremise des chandails, donc c'était voulu! C'est pire que pire.
Le bonhomme en bédaine? Tellement d'accord. Et Homme est averti de ne jamais sortir en public juste en short/sandales/bédaine. Oh noes, not gonna happen.
(Same goes for me topless, not gonna happen either, lol!)
Oh, I could live with you going around topless though! LOL
HAHAHAHAHAHA
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